Reasons why not to get drunk

I would like to describe how heaving out the side of your own car isn't the smartest thing that happened to me. The night started out so nicely so quit and peaceful. When suddenly I received a suprise phone call and it was my boyfriend informing me that the party that was suppose to be on Halloween was moved to that night. Reved I said i would be less than an hour and i was off to get into my lovely dorathy outfit. not to mention my very sexy dorathy outfit. and then i was off to fond du lac to have a good time.

we got to the party and there were so many people there i clung closely to my boyfriend who at the time was dressed up as john luke pecard of the u.s.s enterprise. of course he pulled it off perfectly and of course i pulled of my outfit perfectly. the only problem we didn't match as a couple. but how can you match an outfit to john luke pecard of the u.s.s enterprise. there is no way to match it. so i stood firm with my overly elaberate dorathy outfit. that of course was a very sexy outfit.

well any way onto the juicy stuff. we got into the house. again we got into the house that was a bit of a challenge. but we did manage to get in after a little forcefulness. i stuck like glue to my boyfriends side not wanting to lose him for fear of being swallowed alive by the hords of party going costumeers. there was so many people there i couldn't believe that so many physical bodies could fit into such a small area.

any way the party was great all the people was invigorating but after three and a half shots of whisky and 3 or 4 beers to say the least i wasn't doing so well,only after just a short time of being there. we unfortunatly left a bit early and my boyfriend, way more sober, drove and i willed myself to hold it in until i got back to his place. but i couldn't and i didn't want barf on my floor so the open window was my best option. and the rest is history. to say the least that was my first encounter being stone drunk. yeah i would call it stone drunk.

from now on its only one or two beers for me.

Art Because

I make art because I am the God of my own world. I can hold the creation in the palm of my hand and control the universe. Simple shapes transform and mold into magnificent lines and contours of images that dance across the vista of my mind. It is my job as an artist to convey my gift to others and selfishly enjoy the power I hold over those who cannot enjoy the same freedom. But this comes with a price, because the power that I hold and lavish betrays me to some other incapability that I lack. My interpretation skills of complex scientific mentality is lost if it isn’t explained at a visual standpoint. My logic skills sway to the rhythm of my uncontrolled artist emotion. What is nothing can be turned in an instant into something over nothing, because my logic fails and my power happy artist emotion reigns supreme. To oppress this spontaneous nature pinches vital fluid from reaching my artist flow. But people change and bad things happen. Growing older, provoked illness, moving away, finding someone new, living the life you always wanted. Slowly killing yourself to responsibility. Finding every reason not to make art. You have to work early in the morning. You have a paper due in two days. You were lazy yesterday and need to exercise today. I need more inspiration. I can’t today I just don’t have the time. I’ll try this afternoon if I have some time. Nobody cares if I draw anyway. Yes, I’ll draw that for you, but not for me. Yes, I will continue to make excuses about my in-capabilities that are my true abilities. I want to draw. I want to fill the power formerly rivaled by others. I want to say no to everyone and everything get lost and remain in a state of hopelessness. Scream at the top of my lunges what’s wrong with this world I’m living in. Spit flames of prejudice at the church and stab the people I care about the most in the back and laugh maniacally as I hear their cries of sorrow. I want everything I ever wanted to befall me and let no one else share in that same joy. I don’t want any of these things at heart. I have a place to stay, I have a little money to pay bills, I have a wonderful boyfriend, I even more I have amazing friends, I have a dog, I have my own life away from my crazed parent, I have talent, I have family, I have love, I have selflessness, I have forgiveness, I have dreams-ambitions, I have a will, I have a drive…

… I have myself.

Can't It Stay Sunny Forever

It has been so cold for the last couple of days. I hate winter. I don't want Winter to come. I love winter when it comes to Christmas lights and christmas itself. My favorite is when it snowing and the lights are all ablaze misting the snow filled sky. What I hate about winter the most is the dull gloomy neutral colorless haze of a grey that seems to be absorbed by everything. Not just the sky turns grey but the trees turn grey. They reflect the grey in effort to minimize any energy left from the wonderfully warm summer sun. Reminding you of the sleepless death all the plants take on during the winter.

But this grey only happens when no snow lays peacefully on the frozen ground. Global warming what little effects it has or big effects has reduced are annual snow fall each winter. Sometimes giving us a nice snow yeild or just refusing due to weather conditions to not produce at all. But when there's no snow winter sports and winter fun is lost. All you can see for miles is the endless grey of the sky, trees, and grey road smeared with salt to stop any ice from being to slick.

When everything is sunless and grey depression creeps deep into my bones and strains my intire being. I become lathargic and moody not to mention I would prefer sleeping over any other activity. Simply put lack of sun means I get that seasonal depression thing and I hate it because than I can't be who I want to be on the outside.

That's why I hate winter. Depression is not fun.